Entering the Chat

Verb. A sudden appearance of a person or topic. 

Although usually used for memes, the context here is how often do you speak before pausing?

When someone is talking, our brains tend to go into fix-it mode.

But sometimes the best advice is not to give any.

Just listen.

The “pause” helps because it allows you to process what you’re going to say before you actually do.

Once something is said, physically or virtually, it can’t be taken back (even if you delete it). 🤭

• This skill takes self-discipline and emotional intelligence.

• The more self-regulation you develop, the more self-aware you will become.

It’s important because reading the situation with people dynamics improves only with practice.

Don’t take this as not speaking up or withholding your opinion.

Think of it as the difference between responding 👍🏻 and reacting 👎🏻.

• Responding gathers information, processes it and then contributes to the conversation.

• While reacting waits for their turn to talk based on emotions, disregarding what’s been said.

We’re all guilty of this at one point in our lives, so it’s not about pointing fingers, but taking responsibility.

As a leader, you should never play the victim role.

That includes managing your emotions, choosing empathy over ego and staying calm under pressure.

It’s not about perfection, but minimizing mistakes (especially repeat ones).

Think about a wise leader you know.

There’s a great chance they are a good listener and speaks when necessary.

Let me emphasize “necessary.”

Ego management was mentioned earlier because it’s not about being the smartest in the room.

You should be recruiting smarter people around you so they can compliment the blind spots in your arsenal.

The imagery of having a conversation is like playing a ping-pong match.

Even though you have planned moves, it takes quick reactions to your opponent to be successful.

The key takeaway here: listen before you respond.

• So much of communication today is digital.

• Although convenient, the amount of miscommunication skyrockets.

• The more technology used, the more clarity is needed.

So my encouragement to you is think before you enter the chat.

Take social media comments as an example.

Most conflict can be avoided by listening and choosing not to respond.

There’s wisdom in listening only.

It’s the reason God gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth.

Hope that helps.

God Bless,

Scott

If you found this helpful and you’re looking to improve your soft skills as a leader, here are ways to work with me directly:

• 🗣 Hire me to speak at your company or next event (watch my speaking reel here)

• 🎤 Invite me to lead an interactive training workshop, remotely or in-person (depending on location)

• 🤝 Start 1:1 coaching with me as a new manager, current leader or executive (I once managed 30 people 1:1 weekly❗️)

Also, you can help me out by forwarding this to friends whom would benefit from it! Thank you!