Is Networking A Dirty Word?

There are parts of networking that can feel slimy.

Always pitching, constantly selling and focusing purely on the transaction.

That was my first experience with networking.

But there has to be a way to make it less transactional and more human right? 

Substitute the term connecting instead of networking.

It’s amazing how switching one word out can transform your entire approach.

Connecting just has a different ring to it.

• Forming a relationship, finding common ground, helping out, etc.

As we see a “return to office” the most opportune example is in daily conversations.

It may not apply to co-workers, but when it comes to partners and customers it’s game on.

Nobody likes to be sold to (and most don’t like doing it either).

So rather than continue the tradition of networking, here’s how you can break it.

How would you approach an acquaintance you agreed to have coffee with?

My suggestion is the following: be curious, ask questions and be a good listener.

Now that may sound passive, but some of our favorite friends to talk to are those who do the above list.

I’ve always believed we overthink talking to others.

Networking adds pressure while connecting has no agenda.

For all the introverts reading this, pivoting from networking to connecting might be the change you need.

In fact at a deeper level, everyone loves to build connections (not so much networking).

The main point I’m trying to make here is a mental shift.

Connecting is about people. Networking is about a task.

The last time I checked people don’t like being treated like a task needing to be accomplished.

Although challenging at first, try setting up a conversation with someone you don’t know too well.

Focus on being curious, asking questions and striving to be a good listener.

I’m pretty sure a high percentage of those conversations will go well enough to have another one in the future.

• In networking terms/sales talk - it’s a numbers game.

• Regardless of your “conversion rate” the more people you talk to, the better your chances to sell.

• I agree with the more people you reach out to, the better.

But the main difference is: the intent.

Are you just trying to get someone to buy what you are selling?

Or do you hope to build a connection that may lead to something down the line?

Sure, it’s a short vs. long game difference in approach.

But I’d much rather build connections vs. a network over time.

(Actually if you do the former well, it usually translates into the latter eventually!)

How about you: build connections or build your network?

Connecting is just one of the soft skill techniques I teach, reply to this email for the full list of topics!

God Bless,

Scott

P.S. Last week I talked about Soft Skills as a survival skill, so if you want your company to survive then thrive hire me for your next event!