The Dreaded N Word in Leadership

Hold on. It’s not what you think.

It’s not controversial or a play on words.

I’ve personally seen this act take down leaders and their followers in one fatal swoop.

Do this as a leader and your reputation will be tarnished forever.

I know, enough with the build up - what is it?!

Nepotism.

It’s the act of granting an advantage, privilege or position to relatives or friends.

When leaders use nepotism in their role, trust quickly erodes the organization.

Call it political, but most likely you’ve seen it (hopefully not currently).

It’s human nature to have favorites, but acting on it hurts everyone involved.

Trust is built on connection, consistency and transparency.

Nepotism kills all three.

In this case perception usually matches reality.

And once leaders start to show favorites, everyone not included become disengaged.

So what is at the root of nepotism?

Power, denial and poor management.

We demand our leaders to operate on moral values and character.

But once nepotism enters, supporters quickly exit.

So what do you do when you encounter a leader who uses nepotism?

There’s really only 2 options:

1. You confront them at the risk of making the situation worse.

2. You plan an exit strategy.

The former choice is an all-or-nothing decision.

You’ll quickly find out how “open” the person is with constructive feedback.

The response can range from a renewed respect for your candor to getting fired.

Or the latter is realizing you don’t want to be part of the culture anymore. 

Basically looking for a new job.

Now you may be wondering, “what if I decide to say nothing and stay?”

Although that is an option, consider it settling.

Do you want to be a bystander of seeing injustice happen until it personally impacts you?

When the environment is toxic, you need to act before you become a casualty.

I understand if it doesn’t make financial sense to leave at the moment.

That’s why I suggest planning an exit strategy.

Similar to looking for a new job (while at work, we all know people do it), find something better then move on.

Now if you’re reading this and realize you might be guilty of showing nepotism, it’s not too late to change.

Understand that the fabric of trust is torn by showing favorites and even if people haven’t confronted you it’s because they’re scared of retaliation or just don’t care at this point.

So much of the workplace hinges upon trust and engagement.

Nepotism may feel good in the hand of the beholder, but it completely zaps the morale and loyalty of the group.

This is all too common in leadership and because of a recent situation I was made aware of I wanted to address how to deal with it.

Nepotism even hurts the ones who benefit from it because they receive preferential treatment without deserving it.

If you’re experiencing this and you’re not too sure what to do about it reply to this email and I’ll listen/advise.

God Bless,

Scott

P.S. If you need a leadership talk to motivate your people check out my reel below and contact me for rates!