When Boss Becomes a 4 Letter Word

We’ve all experienced good and bad bosses before.

(Hopefully more of the former than latter.)

But there comes a time where the title of leader shifts to boss…

Occasionally right away, yet mostly over time.

There isn’t one criteria that solidifies it, but here are 3 “battles” you can observe:

1. Trust versus Control

2. Autonomy versus Directives

3. Development versus Interruption  

1. Trust is a two-way street.

You have to give it in order to earn it and vice-versa.

Whereas, the more control you desire it tends to backfire with employees.

Think of it as grip strength.

The tighter you grip, the more you choke the life out of it (happens in golf).

• Leaders trust their people to get the job done.

• Bosses micromanage every detail of the process.

If you want your people to trust you, you have to trust them first.

2. Everyone wants freedom, but it comes with a cost.

Flexibility without boundaries can become dangerous.

• Leaders should always provide direction for their teams.

• But bosses tend to discount the different ways to attain the same goal.

In leadership, you should care about objectives/goals achieved.

Yet each person is unique and how they get to that point differs.

So allowing different styles or “means” to accomplish the end goal(s) is a net positive.

Speaking of control - if people prove themselves by producing results, who cares how they get the job done?

Trust and autonomy go hand-in-hand. But when you try to control people, they rebel against authority (just look around the world news). 

3. How leaders view their people is crucial.

Take for instance the idea of “office hours.”

Even if there is not an allotted time to meet, leaders see learning opportunities waiting to happen while bosses feel interrupted.

This is something I’ve experienced and witnessed firsthand several times.

• Leadership development focuses on ensuring the success of people under their care.

• Bosses want to minimize interaction with others so they can finish their work.

There is a time and place for each task mentioned above, but when you team needs your help it rarely happens during ideal timing.

• The best coaches relish at the moment to listen, ask the right questions and empower their people to find solutions.

• But a boss would rather you DIY and not bother them.

Leadership is challenging to say the least, but those who thrive in it embrace the uncertainty.

Too often leaders turn into bosses because of selfish ambition and pride.

A leader’s primary responsibility is to lead him/herself, then lead others.

This happens when self-development is a priority and sharing what you learn with others is a natural next step.

So if you look at your own situation and realize you’re more of a boss than a leader, it’s time to do some soul searching and look in the mirror.

It’s not too late to make changes for the better.

In fact, you can contact me here for a plan of attack.

Be a leader. Not a boss.

Trust me. Your people will thank you for it.

God Bless,

Scott

If you found this helpful and you’re looking to improve your soft skills as a leader, here are ways to work with me directly

• 🗣 Hire me to speak at your company or next event (watch my speaking reel here)

• 🎤 Invite me to lead an interactive training workshop, remotely or in-person (depending on location)

• 🤝 Start 1:1 coaching with me as a new manager, current leader or executive (I once managed 30 people 1:1 weekly❗️)

Also, you can help me out by forwarding this to friends whom would benefit from it! Thank you!